Succeed At Dating Blog » woman

3 Mistakes That Men Make With Women

Alex — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 17:48:03 +0000

I’m about to share with you some of the biggest mistakes guys make when trying to meet women in everyday situations.

If you really want to become the guy who can walk into ANY coffee shop, book store or supermarket and walk out with 3 to 4 phone numbers or dates from hot women – then you’ve got to make sure you don’t commit these mistakes.

And yes, every guy makes these mistakes. (Yes, even you buddy!)

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MISTAKE #1: Failure To Approach
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The #1 reason why guys don’t approach women is because they think too much. Common thoughts are …

> “What if she rejects me in front of everyone?”
> “I don’t know WHAT to say”
> “She looks busy and probably doesn’t want to be disturbed”
> “A girl that hot definitely has a boyfriend”

These are disempowering thoughts, my friend.

And they’re stopping you from taking the first crucial step to meeting attractive women.

Do you want to eliminate this type of negative thinking?

You can. But you must first understand where these thoughts are coming from.

The answer is FEAR.
You’re afraid of rejection.

You’re afraid of embarrassing yourself in public.

You’re afraid of women thinking you’re a creep.

And whatever other negative thoughts your brain comes up with.

Now here’s the solution. The quickest way to reduce yourfears and negative thoughts is by DOING what you fear most.

I remember being terrified of heights. But then a friend talked me into bungee jumping and now I’m not scared at all.

So how do you get over your fear of approaching women?

You start by doing “warm up sets”.
You begin approaching random people in the street and asking them for directions.

After a few “approaches” you’ll soon realize how easy approaching women is. You’ll realize that most people didn’t reject you (and if they did, they were probably so polite, you didn’t care anyway).

After this experience, you’ll be far more likely to approach some HOT women.

Sound simple? That’s because it IS simple. But don’t be a fool and dismiss this technique without trying it first. Trust me, you’ll be glad you did.

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MISTAKE #2: You Don’t Know WHAT To Say
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I’ve seen this happen again and again.

A guy works up the courage to approach a woman and start a conversation. She enjoys his company and things are going great.

But then, just minutes later, she walks off!

You ask him “what happened?” And he tells you”I ran out of things to say. She got bored and left.”

Now, was that the truth?

The answer is NO.

The truth is, every guy (including you) have VOLUMES of interesting stories and topics you can talk to women about. There is no need for you to run out of things to say.

I’ve noticed that guys who are successful with womenhave one trait that losers do not. They talk A LOT.

They keep women occupied with regular conversation while their brain thinks of banter lines, cocky comedyand attraction stories to tell her.

You can do the same. Start by opening a hottie yousee on the street or at the mall with an opinion opener.And while she’s giving you her opinion, relax and letyour brain think of cool things to say.

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MISTAKE #3: You Don’t State Your Intent!
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I don’t care what the gurus say …

At some point, a woman needs to know how you feel about her.

If you don’t tell her that you’re attracted to her, then she might put you in the dreaded “friends basket.”

Some of the smoothest pickup artists I’ve seen “in-action”will tell women how they feel about them within MINUTES.

And when you do this, you will generate attraction in womenreally, really FAST. Go ahead and try it. You’ll be blown away.

Now here are some examples of “going direct.”

HER: “…I spent the last 3 years living in Japan”
YOU: “You lived in Japan? That’s SO cool. I love a womanwho is adventurous and travels. I think it’s such a rare and attractive trait. Wow, you can be my new tour guide of Japan!”
HER: “He he, sure!”

So what you need to do is directly TELL her that you’reattracted to her (more than just her looks).

Your Friend,

Alex

Picking Up Women In Coffee Shops

Alex — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 16:43:22 +0000

Picking up or approaching women in coffee shops is by far the most convenient way to approach women. If you have a busy time schedule but always seem to make time to grab a latte at a coffee shop then you should learn how to start natural and flirty conversations with waitresses or other women in the coffee shop.

Coffee Shop Pickup Tip#1

You’re waiting in line and there’s a hottie in front of you, tap her on the shoulder gently to get her attention and in a firm, friendly voice and a smile say:

You: Hi there …what coffee do you recommend? There’s so much here to choose from …

Her: hehe yeah I’m getting a mocha they’re pretty nice and I love chocolate so you should get one of those

You: thanks I’ll take your advice, but if I’m not happy I’m coming after you…

Her: hehe okay …

When you get to the counter ask in a loud voice (so the cute girl you were just chatting to can hear)

You: Hi there … Can I get a Latte thanks …

Coffee Shop Pickup Tip#2

Relax. Most daytime pickups are very low energy and especially coffee shop pickups. Make sure you slow down your speech (do this if you feel a little nervous) and slow down your movements and body language. If you spot an attractive woman in the coffee shop you slowly walk over and start a conversation. Make it look natural and unrehearsed.

I hope you enjoyed these quick tips on approaching and picking up women in coffee shops.

I’ll talk to you soon,
Alex Coulson

Being Unapologetic as a Man and Asserting Your Desire

Alex — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 12:37:24 +0000

If you’re a typical nice guy, considerate, genuine, likes to talk and have intelligent conversations with women then you MAY have been in this situation before.

Do you ever find that the more you talk to her (without escalating physically) you end up talking yourself out of closing the deal. Suddenly you realise her body shift, the conversation die out to some neutral and boring topic, and she starts looking around the room at other couples possibly thinking “man why isn’t this guy making any moves on me, does he like me?”.

If you know what I’m talking about here then keep reading as you’re not alone, in fact this used to happen to me ALOT. This I consider also a HOT topic when it comes especially to dates.

You’re sitting there at the table, opposite each other face to face, had a great meal and a bottle of wine, and you’re thinking “How do I kiss this girl from all the way over here” and my old favorite “I haven’t touched this girl all night and it’s going to seem awkward if I touch her now” suddenly this distance between you seems to be drawing out and it seems she’s further and further away from you.

What eventually happens is you call it a night and you’re outside the restaurant ready to part ways, and you touch her hand poised to strike her a kiss on the lips … and she flinches …. then she looks down at your hand like to question you “What are you doing” or “It’s too early for hand holding buddy” and all of a sudden a drip of cold sweat lines your neck and your pulse starts racing, palms get sweaty and all you hear is your heartbeat thumping away like the Swazi bongos. pum pum … pum pum ..pum pum pum …

Okay …

Getting a little dramatic here, well this used to happen to me on MOST DATES and the reason is I let it happen, I knew what to do and how to prevent it from happening again but I was scared to act. That was a long time ago, now this NEVER happens to me as I assert my inhibitions and I don’t apologise for being a man and thinking AND acting how a man SHOULD act.

I no longer wait for the end of the date, hell no, I kiss her when I feel like kissing, or touching her, puting my arm around her waist when I feel like it. I act on impulse and it’s worked for me ever since I started doing it.

In each of us there are two processes, the first is what is socially acceptable in the circumstances. i.e. We have a great dinner date, we take a long walk, I drive her home and I get a kiss at the doorstep. May get lucky 2nd or maybe even 3rd date, maybe.

Then there’s our inhibitions of what we WANT to do, have a quick dinner, foreplay in the car on the way back to her place, “Make her surrender and submit” to you in the bedroom, the kitchen, the lounge room and on the balcony and then you kiss her good night and tell her to call you.

Nice huh …

The good news and strangely enough the most effective strategy for having more success from the date to the bedroom is to break social norms and follow your inhibitions. Women respond to this more and appreciate this more than the “nice guy” approach. Nice guys finish last didn’t you know? : )

Stop watching chick flicks, where nervous “sensitive” actors are making a sissy fool of themselves courting and being gentleman like. Forget hiding behind these social ideals of how dates should go and create the date how YOU want it to go.

The fact is most of us get our knowledge on the dating scene and the “how to” on dates from movies.

Answer this honestly do you ever consult your male friends and ask them what to do on a date? Do you ask your siblings, parents or other family what normally goes down? no probably not.

You get the ideals from movies, film, tv and the MEDIA. Yes, that evil media that manipulates men into buying gifts, expensive diamond rings, working 50 hours weeks to get a good car and an expensive apartment so women will be more responsive to them. The fact is women aren’t much more responsive to this as much as you think, I know of guys who take girls back to their hostels (where they share a room with 20 other people) and they close the deal on a bunk bed. They do this consistently too with beautiful glamour girls.

Women want men pure and simple.

What women want is an un-apologetic man who believes in honesty, being genuine and is unashamed of his desire as a man. If the girl says “let’s just be friends” which is the dreaded friends zone line he would say “I have enough friends” and walk away or convey he’s willing to walk away. Powerful huh.

Women RESPOND to men. Women want MASCULINE MEN to take them in every way possible. They want the man to be most importantly:

-Unapologetic about their desires

-True to themselves (don’t say things that are meant to impress her)

-Genuine and sincere

Don’t be ashamed of what you’re thinking and be open to touching her and kissing her when you feel like it (Don’t plan it or do it just because this is the moment when you “should” touch/kiss her).

I hope you learn from this and start acting out your desires as this is the only TRUE way to live.

Talk soon,

Your friend

Alex Coulson