Why Men Are Shy Around Women – Eliminate The Fear Finally

April 30, 2009 by · 2 Comments
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712Q:Why are men shy around women…

Research suggests that approach anxiety and “FEAR” around women stems back to the stone age where we would live in small tribes on this planet, tribes no bigger than 50 people.

This ‘shyness’ so to speak came from our inability to approach females in our tribe for fear of being physical repercussions i.e. being beaten and killed by the tribal leader or his ape like friends.

This sounds completely natural. If you were tribal leader and you found that one of your mates female mating partners was cracked onto by another male how would you react?

Would you take the biggest dinosaur bone you see (a real bone that is) and pummel him to the ground I expect.

Well welcome to the origin of our fear around women. We are shy to make moves because of this inbuilt mechanism in our genetic make up to be weary around females for fear of the boyfriend or the boyfriends friends.

To add to that we are afraid of getting rejected and here’s the main reason why …

We are still accustomed to living in small tribes or 50 person societies and being rejected by a female in such a small society will spread to the other females, the males and eventually you’ll be weeded out of existence by being rejected by other females, or being beaten with a dinosaur bone by the tribal leader.

Our shyness around women comes to down to pre-selection.

771What is pre selection and why does it help us get over our nerves?

Let me explain. Have you ever walked into a bar and spotted a man surrounded by women, not good looking just an average guy but with 3 women on his side. You’ll notice that other females in the bar will turn and notice this and instantly give off attraction signals.

What attraction signals you say?

Every kind of attraction signals! They don’t even know this guy however they’re already sending signals his way to show that they’re attracted to him.

Its simply a time saving mechanism. They’re saving time by pre-selecting males with women already around him. If they’re attracted to him then she could be too thus weeding out all the other “loser guys” wanting to earn her approval by supplicating with gifts etc and being “wussie” around her.

Women are not attracted to these men.

Men will always be shy around women as like I said it’s evolutionary and inbuilt into our genes to feel this fear, it’s a matter of survival.

So the only way to get over it is to get used to it. It’ll always be there deep inside you and the only way you can deal with this shyness is by accepting it, and learning to deal with the symptoms.

If you ask somebody that’s successful with women how he deals with anxiety and he says he’s never had any then he’s lying. Everybody would have felt it at one point or another.

When you get good (with practice) at approaching women non-stop you start to notice the fear vanish, and soon there will be only a slight fear of women that will have no weight in any of your thoughts…for ever more.

I’ll talk to you soon!
Alex